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Other Attendees: Merri S Wilson  megan F, Eva, jessica silva, mayra, kelly frazer, liz (natural science), kyle julia andrea caroline, tiffany (CNS-computer science)

Discussion Notes

  • Welcoming School
  • Dr. Rebecca Bigler
  • Conversations can look different from different families
  • People with privilege often feel like it is a choice to have these conversations, but other people may not have the choice.
  • Its our more privilgrd identities that we are not as used to speaking to.
  • Kids are not blank slates and they are not color blind
  • Kids brains are noticing ALL the differences and trying to sort out which ones are important and which ones are not.Brains are always trying to make meaning of differences
  • In absence of saying anything racist, they will notice segregated spaces and try to determine what that means for them.
  • Kids tend to have in-group preferences (blue shirt vs red shirt preference)
  • Even if we are  not explicit, they are still going to make meaning, but they are making meaning in a segregated/racist society.
  • Color Blind language: "just be nice to everyone" "we treat everyone equally" but most racism is implicit 
  • it is scary and we are afraid of making mistakes, but remember you have access to your kids over a long period of time and you can always repair if you mess up!
  • In fact, being more transparent with kids, the better!
  • Often we are more comfortable talking about gender versus race identity and stereotypes.
  • Remember that it will take kids a while and they will ask the same questions over and over to understand categories and how to "sort" people.
  • This iterative/repetitious process gives you plenty of time to "try again" in getting the answer better refine your answers each time for your kids.
  • The most important thing to show our kids is that repair is possible. We need to have self-compassion and model HOW to repair.
  • Social Identity Wheel: Documentation Status, first language, sexual orientation, romantic orientation, socioeconomic class, race/ethnicity, religion, age, ability, gender expression, cis/transgender identity, gender identity, 

Action items

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